Online Validation

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Online validation refers to the compulsive need for internet-based approval, specifically through digital likes, comments, and followers. Among women, especially normie or pick-me archetypes, this has become a primary source of self-worth in the digital age.[1][2]

For men, online validation is often tied to their ability to express misogynistic views publicly without consequence.[3] Strangely, men tend to claim the opposite: that women are more able to be publicly misandrist. However, this ignores the existence of thousands of misogynist forums and websites across the internet.[4]

Definition

Online validation is the constant pursuit of affirmation through digital feedback. It manifests through dopamine-seeking behaviors such as thirst traps, performative content, and status chasing.[5] Platforms like TikTok, Instagram, Reddit, and Discord have industrialized the process of ego feeding and attention based self-worth.[6]

History

The concept of online validation emerged alongside early social networking sites, where users began quantifying their social worth through follower counts and “engagement metrics.”[7] While it affects both genders, its effect on women has been particularly insidious, with societal conditioning rewarding them only when they’re deemed attractive, agreeable, or submissive.[8]

Pick-me women, in particular, depend heavily on online validation to maintain their delusions of superiority. Meanwhile, femcels receive little or negative feedback, reinforcing the reality of the pinkpill: that society only values women who appeal to the male gaze.

Female experience

For HMTB and above, online validation acts as both a currency and a curse. They are constantly rewarded for basic selfies, filtered images, or recycled aphorisms.[9] Platforms encourage them to monetize themselves through attention, leading to a loop of self-objectification, performance, and emotional instability.[10]

Notes

  1. Marwick, Alice E. "Instafame: Luxury selfies in the attention economy." Public Culture 27.1 (2015): 137–160.
  2. Chou, H. T. G., & Edge, N. (2012). "They are happier and having better lives than I am": The impact of using Facebook on perceptions of others' lives. Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, 15(2), 117–121.
  3. Kleinman, Zoe. "The misogyny of online abuse." BBC News. 2021.
  4. Ging, Debbie. "Alphas, betas, and incels: Theorizing the masculinities of the manosphere." Men and Masculinities 22.4 (2019): 638–657.
  5. Meshi, D., Tamir, D. I., & Heekeren, H. R. (2015). "The emerging neuroscience of social media." Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 19(12), 771–782.
  6. Andreassen, Cecilie Schou, et al. "The relationship between addictive use of social media, narcissism, and self-esteem: Findings from a large national survey." Addictive Behaviors 64 (2017): 287–293.
  7. Baym, Nancy K. Personal Connections in the Digital Age. Polity, 2015.
  8. Tiggemann, Marika, and Isabella Anderberg. "Social media is not real: The effect of ‘Instagram vs reality’ images on women’s social comparison and body image." New Media & Society 22.12 (2020): 2183–2199.
  9. Dumas, Tara M., Maxwell-Smith, Matthew, Davis, John P., & Giulietti, Paola A. (2017). "Liking, commenting, and sharing on Instagram: Associations with peer belonging and depressive symptoms." Journal of Adolescence, 55, 41–50.
  10. Fardouly, Jasmine, and Phillippa C. Diedrichs. "Social comparisons on social media: The impact of Facebook on young women's body image concerns and mood." Body Image 13 (2015): 38–45.